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Exasperated Jessica Tarlov doesn’t ‘wanna see any more penis pictures’ of Hunter Biden

December 30, 2023 | | Print Article

Democratic strategist Jessica Tarlov is tired of seeing pictures of Hunter Biden’s penis.

And really, who can blame her?

As the entire world now knows, it’s not a particularly interesting penis, and it tends to distract people like Tarlov from the things that really matter — like, say, a trove of emails that point to an influence-peddling scheme between a sitting vice president and the enemies of the people he is meant to represent.

When Rachel Campos-Duffy, co-host of Fox News’s “The Five,” suggested on Friday that Joe Biden won the White House in 2020 because the information on Hunter’s notorious laptop from hell was suppressed by the FBI and other officials of the federal government, images of Hunter’s penis flooded Tarlov’s narrow mind.

(Video: Fox News)

As Tarlov was arguing that things — “the economy,” “crime and safety,” and “the border” — are “better” under President Biden, thoughts of Hunter’s dangling dong were more than she could bear.

“If you go and look at the RealClearPolitics average or the 538 average, you see that Joe Biden is around two points down in the averages there,” Tarlov told the panel. “There are a slew of polls including swing state polls where he’s leading Donald Trump. And frankly, there’s this denialism about what the last elections have said. Democrats won in 2020. Joe Biden did that by millions of votes on top of it.”

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“By suppressing a laptop and changing the election!” Campos-Duffy stated.

“Oh my God! You think Hunter Biden’s penis pictures were gonna sway this!” Tarlov shot back.

Perhaps not.

But perhaps knowledge of then-Vice President Biden’s extensive use of pseudonyms when discussing his son’s shady business deals with foreign entities — discussions that he adamantly denied having — may have made a difference.

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Perhaps knowing that Joe Biden was known as the “Big Guy” and was allegedly taking 10% from those deals for himself would have swayed some voters.

In February, Rep. Elise Stefanik (R-N.Y.) made the case that the information — or the intentional lack thereof — may very well have influenced the outcome of the 2020 elections.

“The FBI paid Twitter over $3.4 million of taxpayer dollars to censor stories – including the Hunter Biden laptop story. 53% of Americans made aware of the Hunter Biden laptop story would have changed their vote in 2020,” she tweeted at the time. “This is unconstitutional election meddling.”

Of course, the liberal “fact-checkers” immediately moved to discredit the poll she was citing, but for those who are able to tear themselves away from Hunter’s penis pics long enough to read a few emails, one must believe the questions raised from the exchanges would have been valuable information for voters to have.

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But we’ll never really know, thanks to the effort to bury it all.

“I don’t wanna see any more penis pictures or crack pipes,” an exasperated Tarlov exclaimed.

“Hopefully we won’t,” co-host Katie Pavlich replied. “And Hunter Biden’s laptop is wrapped up.”

Melissa Fine
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