Comedian Rob Schneider’s response to Alicia Keys’ July 4th whining about women’s rights is earning cheers on the Internet.
While the rest of the United States was busy celebrating the 250th birthday of the greatest nation on the planet, singer Alicia Keys turned the moment into a demand for “equal rights.”
Well, Schneider didn’t take too kindly to this.
Look:
Dear Alicia Keys,
Name one right that women DON’T have in America?! I will wait.
Please know that women are FREE to join men working on offshore oil rigs, on deep sea crabbing and fishing vessels, logging trees with gigantic chainsaws, underwater welding for bridge…
— Rob Schneider 🇺🇸 (@RobSchneider) July 6, 2026
“Did you know that it’s been 100 years since the Equal Rights Amendment was first introduced? And now, still, women don’t have an explicit guarantee to equal rights under the U.S. Constitution. Can you believe that? I couldn’t even believe that was real,” she laughed. “I mean, women are not asking for special rights, just equal rights. Let’s turn outrage into authorship. If it’s the 250th celebration of the country, isn’t it time to update some things? What rights or guarantees do you feel all women should have in America? That’s a good question. I’m not here to speak for you; I just want to pass you the mic.”
“Dear Alicia Keys,” he began his response. “Name one right that women DON’T have in America?! I will wait. Please know that women are FREE to join men working on offshore oil rigs, on deep sea crabbing and fishing vessels, logging trees with gigantic chainsaws, underwater welding for bridge construction and underground mining. You and purty lady friends can also collect garbage and recycling at 6 in the morning and when you’re done with that you girls are welcome to risk your lives restoring electricity on high power lines.”
“These ‘rights’ are waiting for you but you gals won’t do it, because you need men to do it. Because that is what men do: risk their lives day in and day out so you lovely girls can just pretend that all those things magically take care of themselves while you bitch and moan about perceived injustices and lack of rights,” he continued. “So you go girl, Enjoy your electricity and your roads being repaired and your garbage being magically picked up every Tuesday morning and your fancy vegetables and grass fed steaks trucked into your grocery store at 5 in the morning, while you have Vietnamese ladies paint your toenails. You can call it toxic masculinity, but you would cry your lovely fake eyelashes off when your Air Conditioning breaks down for more than 3 hours.”
“Your welcome!” he concluded his post. “Yours truly, MEN.”
X users celebrated Scheider’s clapback:
Talk about privileged… maybe the one thing they don’t have is respect for life… and that’s why they are on these quests to protect others who don’t need protection (criminals, illegals, protestors, pedophiles, drug addicts, and all money grubbing democrat leaders)
— JabbasRevenge (@JabbasAfro) July 6, 2026
It’s like she forgot she is in America, last I checked she’s allowed to be a singer and allowed to be very rich and allowed not to wear a hijab…. Go cry to Parastoo Ahmadi and let me know how she reacts
— Rockin D Beard (@AngelmDevilm) July 7, 2026
Exactly! And she is free to make how many millions as a free female performer? No one limited her or banned her right? Hmmm 🤔
— Evellyn De Caal (@EDeCaal) July 7, 2026
Fun fact: l worked in male dominated industries (auto parts, oilfield, trucking, agriculture) most of my adult life, much of it in the South ( mostly Louisiana and Texas) and I was NEVER denied a job application or a job UNTIL I moved to California. Go figure.
— Laurie Hockaday (@La90409Laurie) July 7, 2026
Only right that women have lost is the right to privacy in our own public restrooms. It’d be great if she would fight for women’s rights.
— Linda 🤠 🇺🇲 ♓ (@lindairudd1) July 6, 2026
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