Barking up the wrong tree: Chicago adopts rule on how long dogs can bark, as crime and inflation soar

As Chicago residents struggle to survive soaring inflation and soul-crushing crime statistics, the city of Aurora, Ill., a suburb of the Windy City, has elected to go after pets and their owners in a newly-amended ordinance that will now fine owners if their dog barks outside for more than 15 minutes.

The Aurora City Council made changes to the animal control ordinance and, in addition to shushing Spot, it has now made it illegal for residents to own more than four “companion” or farm animals, according to a report from NBC local affiliate, WMAQ-TV.

“Companion animals” are defined by the Council as “a dog, cat, ferret, rabbit, guinea pig, hamster or other similar  domestic animal commonly kept as pets.” What’s more, you can no longer own more than two of any species.

 

Those residents who owned more than the allotted number of pets, or those who already share their homes with three companions of the same species, prior to the law being passed will be grandfathered in, according to the Council. Residents can apply to animal control should they wish to own an additional pet, but they will first have to prove that all their pets have had their vaccines, been microchipped, as well as spayed or neutered all in the last five years.

And then there are the “excessive noise” regulations.

According to the City Council, excessive noise is no longer permitted outside between the hours of 7 a.m. to 10 p.m. Should a neighbor report that your animal has been barking for more than 15 consecutive minutes during those hours — or for longer than ten minutes between 10:01 p.m. and 6:59 the next morning — you will face an initial citation of $100.

Don’t worry, though. Your neighbors are going to need some proof of your pesky pup’s off-hour barking.

For a complaint to count, it must be either caught on an audio or video recording, be made by two or more people from different households, or be corroborated by animal control or law enforcement.

Now, a local animal control ordinance such as this one would not, in a sane world, receive much attention outside the local news, but as American Wire has been reporting for some time, crime in Chicago is out of control, making many wonder if policing pets is the most productive use of the Aurora City Council’s time and resources.

“The place is a war zone but they are gonna crack down on dogs barking,” laughed one Twitter user.


And laughing at the authoritarian Aurora ordinance seems to be how some of social media is coping with the crackdown.

“That’s it,” proclaimed another Twitter user. “Chicago just solved it all.”

“The dog gets shot at 3 barks,” quipped another.

“What if the dogs have guns?” pondered yet another.

But for others, the absurd timing of this ordinance is no laughing matter.

“Yes, with all the people being shot on a regular basis in Chicago, this law makes a lot of sense,” one user stated. “OMG what has happened to us?”


One user, however, turned the excessive noise restrictions into a perfect metaphor for recent attacks by progressives on 2nd Amendment rights:

“These types of laws only hurt the good boys that obey the law and does nothing to prevent bad dogs who are gonna bark anyway.”

Melissa Fine

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