Dad gets an earful when he asks if he’s an ‘a**hole’ for demanding ‘conservative’ father use pronouns for stepson

A Redditor who goes by the handle “Dad-that-stepped-up,” asked on the platform if he was out of line for demanding that his father respect his new stepson’s gender pronouns and got mixed responses to his woke handling of the situation.

The post on Reddit was titled, “AITA for demanding my father respect my stepson’s pronouns?” “AITA” stands for “Am I the A**hole.”

According to Fox News, the writer noted that he recently married an “absolutely wonderful woman” and gained “an even more wonderful son.” The transgendered child is 13 years old and evidently identifies as “non-binary,” using the “they/he” pronouns.

The father stated that he “of course [has] no issue with this” and proclaimed his full support for his son, as does the boy’s mother and “most of the family.”

“The past few months have been spent introducing Cole to my side of the family with all being very welcoming to him,” he wrote. “All except my dad.”

He went on to call his father “a bit conservative.”

“I wouldn’t call him a bad guy,” he stated concerning his father. The Redditor called him “stubborn” and rooted in “his own ways.”

In the beginning, the man’s father was “very excited” to meet Cole.

The man told the boy that his father “may not be the most supportive of people” and that seeing the stepgrandfather was “entirely up to him.”

Cole said he wanted to meet his stepgrandfather, “but I remind him he can opt out at any time,” the Redditor wrote.

At first, everything went according to plan but that changed when the topic of pronouns came up.

“The two hit it off, everyone’s having a good time, all seems to be well,” the man wrote. “Then, my dad points to a pin Cole had been wearing that had ‘he/they’ on it.”

Cole was asked what it meant and said that “those are his pronouns.”

“My dad responds back [by] saying that he didn’t believe in all that ‘pronouns nonsense’ and that Cole was not a boy,” the Redditor recounted stating that he and Cole were “taken aback” by the response.

He told his father “firmly and calmly” that Cole preferred to be called “he or they.”

“Pops is pretty conservative and Cole knew as much going into this so both of us expected him to be a bit resistant,” he stated concerning his father. “He’s not being outright malicious — he does see Cole as a grandson, he’s just too stubborn to refer to Cole by ‘he/they.’”

The stepgrandfather “continually calls Cole a girl” and by “she/her pronouns,” the Redditor complained, noting that it was starting to make Cole “very uncomfortable.”

He wrote that he told Cole to “wait in the car while I have a private conversation with my dad.”

“I immediately tell my dad what he did was not cool,” he stated. “I try to keep my composure while explaining that Cole is a boy, full stop. Cole deserves to be referred to as such,” he contended.

“Dad isn’t budging, though, and says while he seems like a nice kid, he’s not partaking in Cole’s ‘delusions,’” the man continued to carp on Reddit.

“It’s pretty clear being polite wasn’t going to cut it, so I had to be blunt with him,” he commented. “I told him to either use ‘he/they’ when referring to Cole or he can forget about seeing either of us.”

Then he wrote, “My dad doesn’t like this one bit, but I stand my ground.”

He told his father that “he’s welcome to give me a call if he’s ready to treat Cole with the respect he is due.”

“During the ride home, I am absolutely apologetic to Cole for all this. My dad is family like anyone else, but he has no right talking to Cole like that,” the Redditor recounted. “Part of me worries I was too harsh.”

Most of those on Reddit thought that the man was in the right in coming down on his father. But then again, Reddit is fairly leftist.

There were a few on the forum who thought the Redditor was way out of line, according to Fox News.

“Your 13-year-old son holds the belief that he is not a male or a female, and you are encouraging it?” a commenter wrote.

A grandfather of three from the Midwest pointed out that the grandfather might be giving Cole “the great gift of reality — at such a tender age.”

“While many commenting on the post want to protect Cole now, what about the future? What if Cole has life-changing surgery at this young age — forever changing a female body to a male body?” he asked.

“At 13, I was so wet behind the ears and knew nothing of life. The grandfather was polite to Cole and interested in meeting her, but will not share the fairytale that her gender is anything but female,” the commenter added. “The grandfather seems to me to be the only one respecting Cole by delivering the truth.”

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