Maher likens ‘purse dog’ Merrick Garland to ‘Barney Fife’ for being too soft on Trump

The increasingly unlikely possibility that the federal government’s trials of former President Donald J. Trump will take place before the elections has leftists fuming, including Bill Maher.

With Special Counsel Jack Smith’s two trumped-up cases against the presumptive GOP nominee having been badly knocked off their pre-election timetable, the comic and social critic lashed out at Attorney General Merrick Garland, a man who will inevitably be scapegoated if Trump goes on to win back the White House.

During the latest episode of HBO’s “Real Time With Bill Maher,” the host devoted his “New Rules” segment to the nation’s top law enforcement official, whining that he was a “purse dog” instead of the attack dog the left wants and likening him to the bumbling Mayberry deputy Barnie Fife, played by Don Knotts in the classic 1960s TV series the “Andy Griffith Show.”

“At the top levels of our federal government, giving a guy a job because he got screwed over for another job isn’t a good reason to give a guy a job, especially if the job is Attorney General, and especially if it’s during a time when we need a tough AG to catch a real criminal,” Maher said.

“Merrick Garland, who is that Attorney General I speak of and who SPOILER ALERT: sucks, was you may recall President Obama’s pick for the Supreme Court in 2016 after the Clintons murdered Justice Scalia with a pillow. And while our government dysfunction continues to grow, one thing remained sacrosanct. When a Supreme Court justice dies, the President gets to fill the seat… until Mitch McConnell said ‘F**k that. New rule. F**k you.’ Garland never even got a hearing,” the host said, still crying about Garland being blocked from the SCOTUS.

“So when Biden got elected, the Democrats said ‘Wouldn’t it be funny as payback if we gave Garland the Attorney General job?’ And that’s how we got Attorney General Barney Fife,” he continued.

Maher also likened Biden’s hand-picked attorney general to former special counsel Robert Mueller, whose sweeping witch hunt into Trump’s mythical collusion with the Kremlin produced bupkus, knocking the former ex-FBI director off the pedestal that the host and other leftists put him on.

“But with Mueller as with Garland now, when we needed a pitbull, we got a purse dog.” the host complained. “It’s so interesting. When it comes time for Republicans to appoint a special prosecutor. They always appoint a Republican and when it comes time for Democrats to appoint one, they also appoint a Republican. A Democrat has served as a special prosecutor in a major investigation since Watergate. Somehow the rule became it has to be a Republican or it’s unfair, you know, a Dudley Do-Right type.”

“The problem with this case isn’t that Trump isn’t guilty, it’s that it’s being tried in the wrong court. If Garland had done his job, Trump would be in federal court charged with breaking campaign finance laws instead of state court charged with falsifying business records,” he said, bemoaning that the only pre-election conviction of Trump will likely be in the sham trial brought by Soros-backed Manhattan DA Alvin Bragg in the Stormy Daniels “hush money” case.

“Merrick Garland is just so slow he’s like if the 405 was a person,” he added, referring to the California traffic nightmare. “He’s the embodiment of the liberal judge and every 70s cop movie, The one who always lets the psychopath out on a technicality and then the psychopath rapes a nursing school and Clint Eastwood has to kill him with a bazooka.”

There used to be a time when Democrats actually tried to win elections the old-fashioned way, not by having their top opponent thrown in jail.

Chris Donaldson


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